There is no solution but to keep moving forward, feel the feelings, and trust God for the rest. Even the smallest amount of faith you can muster is enough.
I complained to my T today that I feel like I'm not making any progress. He reminded me that I've only been dealing with this for about 8 weeks. Seems like yours to me. Your years must feel like an eternity to you. We're in the same boat. You don't have to trust us, just row with us till we can see the other side.
"But now old friends are acting strange,
they shake their heads, they say I've changed.
Something's lost but something's gained in living every day
....it's life's illusions I recall, I really don't know life at all. "Joni Mitchell