It's really weird-- it's like I have all these issues that didn't make any sense (like anxiety when going to use a restroom) that suddenly made a lot of sense. And so much in my life really started to connect together. I can't help but worry i didn't fabricate some "why is this" explanations. But it really, really helps to know you've felt the same.

And I like that curtain analogy. It could be where I'm having a relatively good day then all the sudden "SURPRISE, LETS SEE BEHIND THIS DOOR!" and I'm knee-deep in an oddly vivid flashback. Sometimes it's odd details I remember like cold hands or color shirt I was wearing. Other times it's like I can remember the smell of laundry detergent or dust and it's really vivid-- it's incredible something so strong could be covered up so i guess I worry about it a lot.

I still kind of remember the first person I ever told about my problems, how he asked what was wrong with me and suddenly I'm spilling my guts about something, able to tell what color shirt and pants I had on when I was 4 years old and what I could see through a window, just out of nowhere it seemed. That's what scares me so much too-- not knowing what else there might be :c