Maybe be triggering for some. ....



Truth is in my opinion , others don't care about our struggles and what it does to us when they say something hurtful or remind you of your past failures. Truth is we have probably hurt them too with a past act. Truth is that they are ready to forgive you as long as it is on their own terms and conditions. They just don't realize that their words are sometimes so strong and hurtful that it triggers some of the worst thoughts and depression. Or maybe they do realize it and just don't care. To say that we are getting better and they are proud of us and then rip all that out with a few words is brutal. Never mind the fact that we usually beat ourselves up over things way too much anyway because most of the time we feel so unworthy. Nevermind that,, go ahead and shove that dagger in. Yeah it feels good. Nevermind the fact that you have made a complete 360 degree change fr the better. All that is nothing. I mean I probably wouldn't like me if I was them either. So why should I expect to me special now ?? I am nothing and never have been but I am better than I use to be. To hurt me is nothing new, hell I have been in pain my whole life. All of this for what?? What good comes out of it? Just when we start to feel a little self worth, wham, we get smack right back to reality. They know what we were so they think that is who we are. Can I blame them? Nope. Can I stop it? Nope. Is it at all helpful? Nope. So what good comes out of it? Just to know that they humiliate us and hurt is?? I guess for what I have done in my past I deserve to be humiliated and hurt and depressed. I guess that is the only way that they can heal. Might as well I mean it ain't like I am gonna think I deserve anything better anyway. I think about as much of myself as thu do. Nothing. Always have and always will. I hope they feel better about what was said because if I am gonna feel like trash of te earth I sure hope it was worth it and they feel better. Whatever who cares anyway. It is what it is and that is all it ever will be. Screw it. It don't even matter anyway.
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Ephesians 6:13

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

Ephesians 5:25

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her