It sounds like you made it through that very uncomfortable situation and I'm proud of you. I'm 47 and I have been out since my late 20's. I don't hide it, but my partner and I don't run around shoving gayness in everyone's face. I hate that being gay will always have to come up somewhere down the line. I have learned throughout the years that I will let people get to know me, and when the "Gay Question" comes up, I will always say " I can't believe you didn't know I was gay".. lol Works every time and it seems to ease the pressure of that person.
My partner and I have been together for 13 years, well past many straight marriages and yet many straight people do not put our relationship on the same level of their marriage. I live in Arkansas and I hear gay jokes, mental illness jokes, and other crazy things. Sometimes I tell the person that it is not funny. Other times I might say "I have a friend who is gay and don't like gay jokes." The fact of the matter is we are gay, I've been gay since birth and I am proud to be gay. Others do not define us. We must be comfortable with the person we are.
You will know when and if you are ready. Just do not rush it and be the best you can be. We have enough burdens on us from CSA. I'm glad you shared this experience with us. We have all been there.
Keep the faith my friend,