yes - what Val said!
his motives are a key. repeating past = bad. making new path = good.
take it slow and stop if you sense it going wrong.
stay "in touch" with one another - both "present" and aware of each other.
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"That you are here - that life exists, and identity; that the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse. . . What will your verse be?" Robin Williams as John Keating in "Dead Poets Society"