i appreciated it as a poem - great vivid writing.
sorry to be so blunt - i wasn't offended exactly - maybe taken off-guard is more like it.
i admire your way with words.
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They have greatly oppressed me from my youth, but they have not gained the victory over me.
Plowmen have plowed my back and made their furrows long.
But the Lord is righteous; he has cut me free from the cords of the wicked.
Psalm 129:2-4