I wonder if survivors in general "escape" by entering relationships. It seems to be the opposite from what I have seen on these boards. Would love some feedback on that...

On a different note, NF, please try to control your thoughts and keep them positive as they relate to your self esteem. This constant questioning of your value to him is a game that will only hurt you in the end. Just grab hold of those thoughts and try to keep your mind from working them over and over again. You have value. You are lovable. You have compassion. You are not defined by him.