Thanks kcinohio -
I am still trying to figure out what my Jesse part wants, needs and hopes are besides a sexual component.
I have not, I am not and I will not let Jesse (myself) just impulsively engage in any hookups or explorations which would be unsafe and destabilize my marriage. I get it that that part of my DID system is the compartmentalized feelings and physical sensations of the sexual contact w/ the priest. But I'm not sure how to 'talk' to him. Or how to let him 'express' himself in a way which is non-sexual .. I know this part has information, memories, or wisdom for me in my healing, but I don't know what to do.
Jesse has shown up more in my therapy sessions and talks about his frustrations w/ having to be 'hidden' bc that part of me, accepts its/my sexuality as it is, w/out negative judgments.
Only problem is Wifey would explode if she knew I even thought about such bisexual things bc she has been cheated on before (Never By Me) and she is insecure already, even though I have stuck by her and been true to her in life's ups & downs. I don't have the heart to upset her w/ the information that I think of bisexual things - which I might not ever do - even if I got 'permission' from her.