I am in a very similar situation, and wonder if you have made any progress on this topic, or come to reach a decision.

For me, the idea of separating, living apart, starting over is a very tough one to come to grips with, and at the same time, the idea of seeing my wife with another man is difficult to handle. I just want her to be happy, and not sure I can give her what she needs.

I identify with your comment about being open with one another, she and I have never been as close as we are now, and I don't want to lose that.