I feel like I am a yo yo.
I am new. I am still trying to figure things out. I have recently read When the Man You Love Was Abused. I know only sketchy details. I have been in this relationship for over 2 years. This is what I don't understand: Why do survivors disappear, withdraw and surface again acting like there is nothing wrong? My boyfriend and I do not live together. Sometimes he will disappear in the middle of a texting conversation. Sometimes he will cancel our plans. We are usually in contact several times a day at his initiation and then out of the blue nothing but a few words for 2-3 days then he is back like nothing ever happened. In the mean time I feel like the girl holding the flower saying he loves me he loves me not he loves me he loves me not. After so many times I am about to tell him that this will not work any more. It is hurting me and hurting our relationship. I truly love him and want to support him in his recovery, but this is beginning to feel disrespectful, rude and dishonoring. If he just communicated that he needs time to think, clear his head or whatever, I can give him the space he needs, no problem. I have asked him several times to do just that. It just kills me that he drops off the face of the earth with no warning. This week he has been talking about marriage and yesterday he dropped out of our text conversation and I haven't heard anything since.
I would appreciate any insight or advise anyone can give me.