Hello all,

Like most new comers to this site, I have been an anonymous user of these forums for a while. I finally gathered up the courage to register and will make a post(sometime in the future) to speak about my abuse and difficulties.

I'm 26 and at the moment, I am at a terrible place in my life. I have no friends, no real education (dropped out of university), unemployed for about 3yrs (have been salvaging a 2yr college diploma in a field that I have no interest to work in, while staying with my parents); got a loving family whose patience is wearing thin.

I cannot, in true honesty, say that my present condition is a direct after-effect of my abuse. I have made some pretty bad choices that are the direct causes. I am an avoidant who turns to addiction every time he has an unmanageable emotion. Most of the time I feel like a failure at life and for a lack of a better word, loser, especially when I look at the people around. Things seem to come so much easier for every one else around me (hope this doesn't come across as whining. I genuinely feel emotionally handicapped to deal with life). I have been stuck in a rut for a few years now.

I am reluctant to go see a therapist now (no finance, still living with parents. don't want them finding out about abuse), but will do so at some point in the future. I'm hoping that I can start taking charge of my feelings by writing on these forums and receiving feedback from others who wrestle with similar issues.

P.S. I apologize if this is long for an intro. I just had to get it out.
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theIrregular