So , I think it's more common in the gay world and I think its more difficult for gay survivors do transcend both the abuse effects and just the tangled mess that is both the gay world and that incessant music. Both have a lot of grinding but too few words.
Yes, there seems to be a veneer of "gayness" around male homosexuals that make them look shallow where really there is - lake you said - a mess.
I am Gay. I am not a mess. I am not weak. I am a survivor of CSA, Incest, Physical Assault, Torture, and other unjoyful child rearing situations. My gay identity was singled out by every perpetrator and every member of my family as an excuse and a valid reason to abuse me. I have been bashed, I have been verbally assaulted, I have had my gay identity disallowed and devalued at every turn in my life. I have been discriminated against and fired when someone on my job found out I was gay. It would have been MUCH easier to be straight....impossible as I am gay, but much easier had I not been. In much of your posts I read and reread what seemed to me to be stereotypical assumptions that could very easily be interpreted as bigotry. I felt as though that were not the case, but to find out that this sort of talking down at a certain group, or conjecture about causes et cet would go unchallenged on our forum was a little disconcerting. I hesitated for a while before posting this, not wanting to just lash out, so keep in mind that I hope to start a debate or conversation and do indeed respect both of you gentlemen. I just did not appreciate your points of view this time.