Dear Sherefe,
I'm glad to hear that your son is finally getting some good support. I'm also happy to hear that he is part off this forum, I'm sure that he will be alright.
I can't speak in names of others survivors but let me tel you that moms didn't failed as humans (neither you did), being mom is long-life role and there is no such thing as failure as long as you are taking care for your child. And from your comments is oblivious that you are caring mom, just proceed like that further and forget about taking some guilt...
I do hope that some mothers would approach you and share some experience, that could be very helpfull for you...
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My story