"It's sad that our abilities to bond, be close, and have friendships as well as our sexuality were damaged by abuse."

This is insightful to the point where it needs to be repeated again. As many here will tell you our abuse taught us many false truths about love, affection, intimacy, and sexuality. Personally, I have struggled with my relationships with men especially when they are closer. I fear they will "find out about me" or the relationship will turn abusive. Furthermore, SSA has been something I experienced firsthand. It is completely normal even if you are heterosexual.

I highly suggest checking out the threads already mentioned and reading Victims No Longer. Many CSA victims experience precisely what you are going through, including me, but we can find ourselves in the confusion. You not only deserve to know the truth about what you are experiencing but you deserve to know the truth about you. As you work through your recovery I assure you there are many wonderful discoveries to come : )
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"Life is like this dark tunnel. You may not always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you keep moving, you will come to a better place." ~ General Iroh