I'm an ASA survivor and my wife has CSA/DID.

while I can't give you a specifically male CSA perspective, I can say that my wife had abuse at 5 and at 13... her five year old self is incredibly dreamy and imaginitive, and always wants to color, draw, and create things. After suffering rape, her personality became excessively pragmatic, to the point where she developed a hatred of play and anything childlike. She stopped engaging in any creative writing, and the creative activities she does engage in involve following an established formula or pattern, such as knitting.

I have noticed that over the years, and since becoming a mother, her capacity to imagine and create has gotten better. This is because of years of consistent support and affirmation she has received from me and other instrumental people in her life, I think. You have to believe that life is worth living in order to have hope for the future. You have to trust others enough to share your hopes and dreams with them. It is possible, even if it takes years. Ask your husband to share his thoughts for you, and give him plenty of affirmation even when he makes small steps toward trusting. A lot of times abused children are punished for anything they do that is creative, so it is hard to undo that as an adult.

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“If a man wishes to be sure of the road he treads on, he must close his eyes and walk in the dark.”

- Saint John of the Cross