i agree with you on porn. when i established what i saw as healthy, i turned to the Bible for help. in my mind, marriage is an exclusive thing that works best when kept exclusive and intimate. porn violates the intent of what marriage was supposed to be. Christ teaches that to lust after these women is the same as actually sleeping with them. i would fill my mind with all these images, and dwell on them for motivation. i never realized what a barrier those create. they are a wall that keep you from feeling all you can for your wife.
masturbation on the other hand has its place in my mind. there are times when because of physical seperation due to illness, jobs, differing libidos where it can bridge the gap. i am careful to focus on my wife, and to take care of her needs before resorting to it, but if i have done my part, i dont see where it violates any>
The world is a dangerous place, not because of those that are evil, but because of those who do nothing about them- Albert Einstein