I think the best thing about this web site is knowing I'm not the only one. Before that it was like the Red Hot Chilli Peppers song "with the birds I'll share this lonely view". I never thought anyone would understand. My neighbor actually taught me how to do that when I was 11. I didnt even have pubic hair yet, and I was able to finish and do it up to three times a day. I was humiliated and shamed publicly.

I started to write the whole story to post, but I feel discouraged by recent posts that have critiqued other posts as fake or attention seeking. My neighbor told me no one would believe me, and people only ever believe what sounds believable. My story is way out there, but 100 percent true.

I'll bet if my neighbor found out about this website that is exactly what he would do: critique posts as garbage and fake and attention seeking to convince people not to believe what doesn't seem normal. Maybe the critics are perps, I dont know. I question the motives of anyone who discourages someone from speaking up. What would someone have to loose by reading a fake post, thirty seconds, a few minutes. I always wondered what my neighbor said to prevent adults who knew some of what he did from going to the police. Now I'm starting to get an idea. I know Lloydy must wonder the same thing from listening to his story. I seriously question the motives of anyone trying to silence anyone else on this web site. I encourage anyone to post anything no matter how unbelievable it seems, and I'll read it and give the writer the benefit of the doubt. What did I loose by reading Lioncub's posts? Maybe thirty minutes of my time total? Maybe I'm so fragile I cant live with the idea that someone else decieved me? As if every single person in the entire world hasnt been decieved at least a hundred times. Oh no, a hundred and one will be too many, is that it? Why should I not listen to some far fetched sounding posts? I would like the guys who critique and discourage to tell me. To be honest all of these stories seem a little bit unbelievable sometimes, but destroying victims credibility seemes to be the perps bread and butter. But I'm a lousy example because I'm going to wait before posting my story if I do it at all. I also worry about giving other perps my neighbor's ideas, so I have to think about the best way to do this.

Just for the record, almost 26 months without masturbating and porn and never felt better about my history with it.

Also I'm glad we dropped the pros and cons of flaming and getting flamed, my post on the subject was taking so much time, I couldnt spend time on more important subjects like the abuse. Although I think we need to figure out some way of dealing with it, because that kind of stuff had a big impact on my interpersonal relationships and ability to trust.

Les_Angry