there is so much of this expressed on this board - both by survivors and fnf. i'm just wondering how people deal with conflicting feelings - i'm thinking nonsurvivors handle them differently; i.e. if i've had a shitty day i'm just as likely to not feel very loving towards bf or anyone else. (tho sometimes he can pull me out of that kind of a rut by just a smile or a joke, you know what i mean.) i am able to realize it's just a bad mood and it will pass, i accept that as part of life.

but when it's him in a bad mood/depressed i try and cheer him up and often times my efforts seem to make things worse - it's puzzling - i let it go and hope he'll feel better later - he doesn't respond it seems the way other people do - i see a darkness and a pain so deep i wonder if it will ever be relieved.

survivors what about you in this situation? so many partners here state how often we are puzzled by your seemingly love us one minute/hate us the next/indifferent the third attitudes that make us sometimes wonder wtf is going on?

how do you face or what do you do about conflicting feelings in your relationships? if you have a bad day/week/month/ongoing period, etc., do you question your feelings towards your relationships as we sometimes think you do? even if we are sure of your feelings on a permanent basis, are there times when you actually doubt if everything you've felt is real? or good for you? or that your judgment is sound? and what do you do about it?

i know this goes back to trusting one's self - are you aware of not trusting yourself? do you work on trying?

indy






_________________________
my avatar is one of the Battle Angel characters, fighting the good fight.