Thank you to the brave souls that responded to this very broad question.....

i know what is in my best interest and i will not nor have not just waited for him to come around. I have and will continue to invest in my own life. I did not leave our home because i wanted to jolt him into doing something about his own life, i did it cause it was way past time to do something about my own.

I wish for a time when it could be an honest trusting for both of us (even though i know that a wish is not anything more than my desires) this is because this man who was hurt by no fault of his own IS WORTH FIGHTING FOR!I also know that my believing in him does not mean he believes in himself.
I am frustrated that by the actions of another 3rd party, this choice in my life has been taken away.

Wait forever, hell no!! and yes, i do deserve all of the love and respect someone has to offer.
I just am wishing that someone was him and if there was a way that i could pursue that dream, i would. But certainly not at the cost of my own life. That is my boundary.

Thanks so much to all of you; as this is something i know in my heart and head, but to have it reaffirmed by someone who is on "the other side" makes me feel that by saving myself, i did not make a selfish choice.
i wish you peace,
M

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"Insanity is doing the same thing over and over, and expecting different results."

I cannot take your steps, but I can walk beside you, if you'll let me.