Thank you all for your thoughts and suggestions, I find them to be right on with my own impressions and feelings.
Since the wife and I have started to really look at what being codependent really involves, things have calmed down quite a bit.
She has been very calm, and seems to be taking a close look at herself, and her behavior, and I have been doing the same.
I found a rather extensive list of the symptoms of behavior of codependent people and while I found most of them to apply to me, she admitted that all of them could apply to her.
I can't help but worry that this is just another "calm before the storm" period, but hey, as long as we keep talking, and things stay calm, I'm willing to hang in there.
Hope everyone has the best weekend possible,
Best wishes and warmest regards,
I'm here for a reason. Failure is not an option.