Here's the thing that struck me yesterday morning... going to therapy is helpful, but how can we totally rely on one person to guide us out of this mess that both husband and I seem to be in right now? How can one person help us combat horrible patterning from the abusive childhoods both husband and I experienced?
One person can help, but it is up to us, BOTH of us to do the work, to learn, to grow and find better. Therapist can not be a miracle worker unless we are willing to dig deep, read books, consider all avenues of possibility.
I went to the library yesterday and checked out a variety of books. One focus was on how to deal with children who definitely know how to push limits. There is a LOT of anger taking residence here right now. The way I see it, how can we overcome and have better if we do not have the skills to impliment peace? How do we raise well adjusted children if we lack the background to do this?
I feel it's all about recognizing a different way and changing ourselves to live a better way.
I had been feeling very down and out regarding the whole situation here.
I checked out a variety of books on relationships. Maybe D will read them, maybe not. I do know that change can begin with an attitude shift of one person. I can be that person!
All I know is that I can't go on living in an angry tainted atmosphere. I had that growing up and I do not desire for any further chaos. I can't do anything about other people here but I can begin with the person that stares back at me in the mirror each day.
I know her well, she's a card...a character...a person who enjoys life and fun. She is strong, full of determination and also one to always seek a better understanding of life and a positive direction.
"As long as he continues to try, I will meet him in that determination and commitment."