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#469497 - 08/29/14 09:35 PM Re: i need your help guys... [Re: pattom]
gettingstronger Offline


Registered: 09/24/13
Posts: 271
Loc: Virginia
Hey Pattom,

Like others have said, you're among friends here and this is a safe place. Calling what happened to you by its proper name is scary as hell, but I think you'll find it's a necessary part of healing from it. And you WILL heal from it! It takes time, effort and support, but given these, it will happen.

Your perp can't isolate you any more. You're here, plus you're among friends who truly understand what happened and what it means deep down. He can't hurt you. Stay connected with others in whatever way brings healing (either here or elsewhere,) but don't play into his hands and feel alone. That's one of a great many things YOU control now.

I know what a Pandora's Box this is for you. People like us get through one issue, get it under control more or less, then it's time to deal with the next one. It seems endless sometimes. But naming what happened to you is part of confronting it, which has to happen before you can overcome it and put it behind you.

Keep up the fight, even when it's painful. You're not going crazy; it's times like these when I personally believe your brain is being rewired for the better.

Bob
_________________________
If you have to rebuild yourself from the ground up, you get to do it the right way this time. And YOU'RE the builder.

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#469506 - 08/30/14 07:54 AM Re: i need your help guys... [Re: pattom]
blacken Offline
Chatroom Moderator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 08/13/01
Posts: 1580
Loc: Northern Ohio
Sometimes, when we are thinking of posting and don't, it's more of a matter of "timing". As in "I Need to say this NOW" and we really want...need...a live audience for real-time feedback, validation &/or acknowledgement.

The chat room is a great source for that.

You get the "real-time feedback, validation &/or acknowledgement" while still maintaining your anonymity. And, you (we, all & any of us) get to process your feelings as they occur, express your thoughts and idea as they are produced, and there are others to help you find the words, and even understand that some times, there simply are no words...

If you (anyone) wants to give chat a try, let me know, I will arrange to be there & help you through the nervousness that some times guys feel in the beginning.

~Paul/blacken

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