Absolutely. I avoided sex like the plague until quite recently. This is a problem when you've been married almost twenty years! For many years, it was a "close your eyes, take a deep breath and hope for the best" sort of thing with LOTS of pressure to perform. Not what you'd call enjoyable, and virtually always ending in failure and humiliation. Thanks a lot, perp and others!
The good news: things have changed dramatically. While I still have to be the one to initiate it for it to not be too stressful, (1) I can now, and (2) it's about intimacy, touch, and being in the moment rather than just if one or both of us can reach orgasm. Maybe we will; maybe we won't. If we do, so much the better.
Also, I'm finally getting much better at communicating what I need, what I'm in the mood for/not in the mood for, if it was a brutal day and I'm tired, and so on. Likewise, if my wife indicates disappointment over something, I don't automatically take it as an attack on my manhood. She's beginning to see the times when I've wanted it and she's been too tired or not in the mood, so she's beginning to recognize that it goes both ways.
If you have to rebuild yourself from the ground up, you get to do it the right way this time. And YOU'RE the builder.