the weird thing about it is that i am an actor and a teacher - and normally have no trouble speaking at all. even in front of a crowd.
another thought that occurred to me is that maybe it is a reaction to having kept the secrets for so long. there was a lot of pressure not to tell anyone. and now i am breaking that taboo.
There’s a special providence in the fall of a sparrow. If it be now, ’tis not to come. If it be not to come, it will be now. If it be not now, yet it will come—the readiness is all. - Hamlet, Act 5, sc 2