That is the feeling when someone tells you what you already know is untrue, but your anxiety and thoughts moving a mile a minute tell you is plausible. Why are we Survivors so quick to take on so much blame and guilt?
I shared a conversation tonight about aspects of my life I feel the most ashamed of. Shared specific details with someone I had never met, and was met with nothing but understanding and compassion.
I am grateful for H, who put one of my fears to rest. I feel absolved - my mind now knows what my heart already did. I am lighter.
"And yes, I have searched the rooms of the moon on cold summer nights.
And yes, I have refought those unfinished encounters. Still, they remain unfinished.
And yes, I have at times wished myself something different."
- Bob Kaufman, I Have Folded My Sorrows -