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#430295 - 04/05/13 11:39 PM I don't hate my abuser
jasondoe101 Offline


Registered: 12/22/12
Posts: 37
I can only imagine how empty his life was and is for him to be who he is. The fact that he couldn't make or sustain any relationships with adults is sad. And don't start preaching this Stockholm stuff to me and telling me what I feel and what I am going through.

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#430303 - 04/06/13 01:20 AM Re: I don't hate my abuser [Re: jasondoe101]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3603
Loc: South-East Europe
It is common thing and I would say that many of us have had confused feelings toward abusive persons. It is sensitive issue and I would say it is partly question of healing path where this should be dealt with greatest care when right time would come.
Many survivors were looking for love and true feelings and unfortunately many times they were betrayed by people who have seen vulnerability and who took their chances in forceful manner.
Amount of energy and other resources needed to try to restore confidence and put some peaces together is evidence how destructive was such betrayal.

_________________________
My story

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#430330 - 04/06/13 10:12 AM Re: I don't hate my abuser [Re: jasondoe101]
Lancer Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/13/12
Posts: 901
Loc: Florida
No, Jason, I'm not gonna go Stockholm on you. I think Pero, as he often does, has cut to the heart of it and I hope it's of some help to you.

I was raised by an abusive parent (physical, verbal, emotional) who virtually handed me, ready-to-go, to my sexual abuser, a high school guidance counselor.

And, yeah, when there are no other choices I could fathom, my young mind just went along with it. Home was, well, home. It was familiar, even with the constant pain. I actually felt a kind of affection for the bitchmother. Again, however, I had no other frame of reference.

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