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#430047 - 04/03/13 11:39 PM Re: Thinking Out Loud [Re: SoccerStar]
BraveFalcon Offline
Greeter
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/25/13
Posts: 1106
Loc: The ATL
Originally Posted By: SoccerStar

I think most people can't comprehend this; I would never have believed it until I started teaching in poor communities. I was the only male teacher, 22 years old. The toughest, cursingest, swaggeringest boys would literally race each other to be the first to get to me and give me a hug. I was the only man in life for some of them, the only non-violent or involved one for others. They fought for my attention. As part of a nature / animals study unit I went to a dollar store and bought each of the students shitty flimsy plastic but quite functional compasses - 24 students, $24, I could deal. Everyone loved it but it was only boys who cried upon receiving it. And did I mention that I collect action figures so I was able to engage in chat about all the popular toys?

I wasn't even trying, I was just giving them my time, and they basically adopted me.


Yeah, I've been in this sort of situation before and had the same thought myself. For me, it's just been having a couple of female friends/acquaintances who were either single moms or who had second husbands that didn't give a shit about their step kids. All it took was being nice to their kids and/or showing them the smallest amount of interest before the kid/kids were hanging all over me, hugging me, wanting to sit on my lap, etc. There have been times that I've been in that situation that afterwards I've thought, "Thank God I'm not some predator." When a child is desperate for attention and affection, any little crumb is a meal to them. I'm sure it makes the ultimate goal of a perp all that much easier to achieve. Sad. frown Peace,

Ken

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#430213 - 04/05/13 01:16 PM Re: Thinking Out Loud [Re: Still]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6422
Loc: 2.5 NATO Nations
I have two fears with them: 1) that I become a soft-target to use for leverage in their life 2) that I fail any of their needs. So I keep my mind constantly going when dealing with them, hearing about them or monitoring my kids' lives.

My ex-wife chooses to copy what her father offered her. She told my son, "if you ever need a 'get me outta trouble' card, you have one. If you are at a party and you need a ride with no questions asked, you need fighter-jets and artillery fire with no questions ask, you got it." I don't fully know what to think of that, but I want ANY of these guys to be able to do that without me offering an imaginary card, and I will not promise or slightly imply secrecy from their parents. I won't do that...it is SO SO wrong! But I have known others who DO just that.

I prefer to offer the prespective and power of an adult in their end-of-the-world problems. I prefer for them to just know I can offer air supremacy and diplomacy...but I will not insulate them or their parents.

So what's the "cool part?"

I dropped them off to skateboard around the school pavement. (They LOVE shooting and producing videos of that.) But when I returned to pick them up, my son had these two giant 1960s era outdoor speakers...the metalic ones with the big cone inside. "these were in the dumpster!" Ok....so yer bringing them to MY house to add to the clutter? "YUP!"

Now, the boy has been a wiz-kid since day-one. I should have known. I SHOULD have known!

I'm sitting in my living room, watching TV, and I hear the local nuclear power plant sirenes going. Some of you may know them as "tornado sirenes." The village know them as "we're all gonna DIE sirenes."

Yeah....he hooked them up to an amp and a pre-amp and his MacBook...and found "sounds." They could be heard for two measured miles! I said, "you ought to turn off your bedroom lights first so they don't see you guys doing that." The town is still buzzing about it...wondering what it was...where it came from.
_________________________
This nation has lost its mind!

The Aftermath Video

The Water Buffalo Song

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#430263 - 04/05/13 07:13 PM Re: Thinking Out Loud [Re: Still]
traveler Online   confused
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3393
Loc: somewhere in Africa
Originally Posted By: Still
I dropped them off to skateboard around the school pavement. (They LOVE shooting and producing videos of that.) But when I returned to pick them up, my son had these two giant 1960s era outdoor speakers...the metalic ones with the big cone inside. "these were in the dumpster!" Ok....so yer bringing them to MY house to add to the clutter? "YUP!"

Now, the boy has been a wiz-kid since day-one. I should have known. I SHOULD have known!

I'm sitting in my living room, watching TV, and I hear the local nuclear power plant sirenes going. Some of you may know them as "tornado sirenes." The village know them as "we're all gonna DIE sirenes."

Yeah....he hooked them up to an amp and a pre-amp and his MacBook...and found "sounds." They could be heard for two measured miles! I said, "you ought to turn off your bedroom lights first so they don't see you guys doing that." The town is still buzzing about it...wondering what it was...where it came from.


laugh cool
_________________________
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


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