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#464266 - 04/19/14 09:50 AM Re: Masturbation Flashbacks and Sexual Self-Abuse [Re: JayBro]
BusterJones Offline


Registered: 04/19/14
Posts: 2
This was an incredibly helpful thread! I'm thankful for this place smile

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#464280 - 04/19/14 07:55 PM Re: Masturbation Flashbacks and Sexual Self-Abuse [Re: JayBro]
JayBro Offline


Registered: 11/13/12
Posts: 271
Loc: Germany
That's awesome Buster Jones!! I know how that feels, when something really bothering you is expressed by other people in your shoes. It is quite liberating! I wish you all the best in your recovery!
_________________________
,,Nun ging es immerzu, weit, weit bis an der Welt Ende."

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#464603 - 04/26/14 02:03 PM Re: Masturbation Flashbacks and Sexual Self-Abuse [Re: JayBro]
GeorgeMartin Offline


Registered: 12/29/07
Posts: 192
Loc: USA
Another book to consider is Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation : Skills Training for Patients and Therapists by author Suzette Boon, Kathy Steele, Onno Van Der Hart.

This training manual for patients who have a trauma-related dissociative disorder includes short educational pieces, homework sheets, and exercises that promote essential emotional and life skills, and support inner communication and collaboration with dissociative parts of the personality. Topics include understanding dissociation and PTSD, using reflection, emotion regulation, coping with triggers and traumatic memories, resolving sleep problems, coping with relational difficulties, and help with many other difficulties with daily lifeThis training manual for patients who have a trauma-related dissociative disorder includes short educational pieces, homework sheets, and exercises that promote essential emotional and life skills, and support inner communication and collaboration with dissociative parts of the personality. Topics include understanding dissociation and PTSD, using reflection, emotion regulation, coping with triggers and traumatic memories, resolving sleep problems, coping with relational difficulties, and help with many other difficulties with daily life.

This training manual for patients who have suffered severe trauma includes a short educational piece, homework sheets, and exercises that promote essential emotional and life skills. Topics include resolving sleep problems, understanding PTSD, establishing a healthy routine, taking care of your body, and understanding traumatic memories.

I just bought this book, and as a result of reviewing it, I highly recommend it JayBro.

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#464634 - 04/27/14 12:10 AM Re: Masturbation Flashbacks and Sexual Self-Abuse [Re: GeorgeMartin]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
Originally Posted By: GeorgeMartin
Another book to consider is Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation : Skills Training for Patients and Therapists by author Suzette Boon, Kathy Steele, Onno Van Der Hart.

This training manual for patients who have a trauma-related dissociative disorder includes short educational pieces, homework sheets, and exercises that promote essential emotional and life skills, and support inner communication and collaboration with dissociative parts of the personality. Topics include understanding dissociation and PTSD, using reflection, emotion regulation, coping with triggers and traumatic memories, resolving sleep problems, coping with relational difficulties, and help with many other difficulties with daily lifeThis training manual for patients who have a trauma-related dissociative disorder includes short educational pieces, homework sheets, and exercises that promote essential emotional and life skills, and support inner communication and collaboration with dissociative parts of the personality. Topics include understanding dissociation and PTSD, using reflection, emotion regulation, coping with triggers and traumatic memories, resolving sleep problems, coping with relational difficulties, and help with many other difficulties with daily life.

This training manual for patients who have suffered severe trauma includes a short educational piece, homework sheets, and exercises that promote essential emotional and life skills. Topics include resolving sleep problems, understanding PTSD, establishing a healthy routine, taking care of your body, and understanding traumatic memories.

I just bought this book, and as a result of reviewing it, I highly recommend it JayBro.


This sounds like a book I need to get soon. Thank you.

Puffer

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#464709 - 04/28/14 03:04 PM Re: Masturbation Flashbacks and Sexual Self-Abuse [Re: JayBro]
learning2remember Offline
Member

Registered: 10/21/03
Posts: 288
Loc: Europe
It's tough to talk about, but there have been times when masturbation and thoughts of the abuse were linked. That's never good. Things can get bad quickly and when they are bad it is tough to stop, but I've noticed that if even just a phone call interupts the downward spiral, it is easier for me to snap out of it. As a result of that lesson, sometimes I'm able to make myself get out. Getting up and about, and especially getting out of the home gets me back to the present, almost always improves my mood, and definitely keeps me from masterbating.
_________________________
"This is not my shame, this is their shame." Mona Eltahawy

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#464710 - 04/28/14 03:05 PM Re: Masturbation Flashbacks and Sexual Self-Abuse [Re: JayBro]
learning2remember Offline
Member

Registered: 10/21/03
Posts: 288
Loc: Europe
It's tough to talk about, but there have been times when masturbation and thoughts of the abuse were linked. That's never good. Things can get bad quickly and when they are bad it is tough to stop, but I've noticed that if even just a phone call interupts the downward spiral, it is easier for me to snap out of it. As a result of that lesson, sometimes I'm able to make myself get out. Getting up and about, and especially getting out of the home gets me back to the present, almost always improves my mood, and definitely keeps me from masturbating.
_________________________
"This is not my shame, this is their shame." Mona Eltahawy

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#466505 - 06/11/14 08:32 PM Re: Masturbation Flashbacks and Sexual Self-Abuse [Re: JayBro]
AndyS87 Offline


Registered: 12/12/08
Posts: 303
Loc: sorry, but I don't say on the ...
Hey JayBro,

There used to be a therapist by the name of Joe Kort who sometimes would address the issues you speak of. Something that he wrote that really resonated with me was the idea of "trauma turned into orgasm". Those who have experienced sexual abuse and the aftermath of it may masturbate to their memories of the abuse, precisely because it puts them in control of the situation. It is supposed to be our way of taking control of something we initially had no control over. Of course, because of the way our brain is wired, the eventual orgasm from masturbation makes the traumas seem like a pleasurable fantasy. Neurons that fire together wire together, and BOOM! There's a whole bunch of different sexual compulsions or unenjoyable sexual habits. Of course this is just me paraphrasing, but that is what I understood from my reading.

Something that helped me immensely and continues to help me is basic meditation. I'm just a beginner myself, so I don't want to go into depth because I don't want to give you any misinformation, but if you'd like, you can google mindfulness meditation or guided meditation exercises and see where it gets you. Hope it helps!

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