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#472403 - 11/11/14 11:17 AM Re: Trying to Start [Re: BuffaloCO]
BuffaloCO Offline


Registered: 07/14/12
Posts: 453
Loc: USA
Thanks Husky. It will be the right time some time. I don't have to rush since I "hid" this for so long anyway. Told two siblings so far and they support me. Telling is freeing, but that's hard to explain why. I won't give up now.
_________________________
“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark. The real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.” - Plato

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#474142 - 12/28/14 07:19 PM Re: Trying to Start [Re: BuffaloCO]
BuffaloCO Offline


Registered: 07/14/12
Posts: 453
Loc: USA
Ok, is it just me, or do others get upset or annoyed at seeing things that describe all victims and survivors as women, and all perps guys? Like a cartoon I saw recently. It meant well, but all of the bad people were males, all of the injured were women. I get very tired of the idea that women and girls are the only ones who really get abused, or get "it". Even in school I heard a few girls say "well if it happens to boys it serves them right, maybe they'll grow up and get it." I wanted so much to tell them my story and smack them into silence with guilt.
_________________________
“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark. The real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.” - Plato

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#474145 - 12/28/14 08:22 PM Re: Trying to Start [Re: BuffaloCO]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 4614
Loc: O Kanada
you are not alone.

i am sick of gender bias and all the attention on female victims.

i guarantee you, men are far more frequently
victims of violence than women.

one sister was violently assaulted ONCE in her life.
the other sister has never been, to my knowledge.

i can't even count how many times i have been attacked,
assaulted, molested, raped, suckerpunched,
slapped, kicked, pushed, shoved,
threatened, robbed.
i feel like a hatemagnet.

in the thirty years i have known my wife,
she was given a black eye, once,
by a another woman.

i have had dozens.

i have been given stitches, black eyes,
bruises, and a broken nose by different women in the past.
some girlfriends don't hesitate to lash out,
with weapons, claws, or closed fist.
throwing things that cut deep, like dishes,
is another thing that many women have done to me.
_________________________
Victor|Victim

War
Love
Poetry

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#474162 - 12/29/14 01:51 AM Re: Trying to Start [Re: BuffaloCO]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3681
Loc: somewhere in Africa
yep - and males are "supposed" to just take it without complaint - to prove that they are "men" - as if there is some virtue in being a silent victim. and it doesn't really "count" if another guy inflicts the injury - because that's just what guys do - and it means even less if a female commits the assault - because you can't admit that a mere woman could hurt you. there is definitely a huge gender bias going on here.
_________________________
"Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself... And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second's encounter with God and with eternity." - Paulo Coelho


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#479076 - 03/15/15 09:56 PM Re: Trying to Start [Re: BuffaloCO]
BuffaloCO Offline


Registered: 07/14/12
Posts: 453
Loc: USA
Good news. I'm speaking in public now, and about to speak to a pretty large group. There could be 800 people there. Every time I do it, it gets easier and I feel more free. Pretty cool I think, for the guy who 4 years ago could not even speak to my T, I had to write it down and read. Now I write it down and practice my presentation. smile
_________________________
“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark. The real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.” - Plato

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#479082 - 03/15/15 11:07 PM Re: Trying to Start [Re: BuffaloCO]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 4614
Loc: O Kanada
excellent.
you will only benefit from these experiences.

congratulations! big win.
_________________________
Victor|Victim

War
Love
Poetry

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