WHEN I WAS A YOUNG BOY MY COUSINS WOULD HAVE ME DO THINGS I DIDN'T THINK WAS RIGHT. AFTER LETTING MY MOTHER KNOW SHE SAID I WAS ONLY MAKING TROUBLE AND SHE DIDIN'T BELIEVE ME. SO AS TIME WENT ON I DEALT WITH IT AND SOON STARTED HAVING FEELINGS OF WHAT MY OWN SEXAULITY WAS. WHEN WE MOVED AWAY I STARTED EJACULATING AND PUTTING BROOMS AND MOPS PLACES WHERE I THE FINGERS HAD BEEN. GOT MARRIED HAD CHILDREN AND SOON AFTER DID SAME THING EXCEPT THIS TIME I USED A BOTTLE. BEEN ABOUT 9 OR 10 YEARS BUT MY CONDITION IS PHYSICAL SCROTUM SAC AND DONG HANGS, FATIGUE, ERECTION PROBLEMS, SIGHT, CONCENTRATION, MEMORY,MUSCULE GROWTH, I PROBABLY COULD GO ON AND ON DOC SAY'S I'M HEALTHY BUT SOMETHINGS WRONG. PLEASE IF ANYONE HAS HELP OR SUGGESTION.

Hi Ron,
There isn't a dam thing strange about what you are doing and what is happening to you! Lots, most, whatever...men that have been sexually abused when a kid feel and do the same things. What makes it fucked up is that you feel bad about it!!!! It's not your fault...it's everyone else...they try to make you feel bad about it...your wife will most likely not like it. YOU MUST GET HELP...the right therapist that "has experience with men that have been sexually abused when young"...NO ONE ELSE WILL UNDERSTAND IT !!!! You need Pro Help to feel good about yourself again. Call your state imformation line and ask for a list of Therapist that deal with childhood abuse in adults...then find a male Therapist that deals with men...have him get you a Pdoc-MD for the meds that you will need. Use a male therapist because women freak out and made it hard to tell your story. AND YES...You should force yourself to tell the therapist your story of abuse as soon as you can and all the details...the faster you tell...the faster you will heal!

Good Luck
Eddie

I used to do things to myself too, find a good therapist who will listen and believe you. This is a great place to be for support. Be gentle with yourself, and take care.