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#81596 - 11/10/05 03:32 PM Re: To A Little Boy
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Josh,

I think your poem is great - it needs to express how you feel, and it sure does that very well.

But as you say, you did nothing wrong. Your abuse was 100% the fault of those who harmed you; let them also need 100% of the forgiveness.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#81597 - 11/10/05 06:20 PM Re: To A Little Boy
melliferal Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/03/05
Posts: 1159
Quote:
Originally posted by roadrunner:
Your abuse was 100% the fault of those who harmed you; let them also need 100% of the forgiveness.
I know I've done nothing to be forgiven for - but Josh 15 years ago didn't. If that's what he's been waiting for all this time, I can give him that much. He has time yet to understand the rest.

Meanwhile, while my perpetrators are the only ones who need any forgiveness, I can't really say when (or if) I'll ever be able to extend any in that direction.

_________________________
Children cannot consent; they can only comply.

Oprah's resources for male survivors

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#81598 - 11/10/05 11:32 PM Re: To A Little Boy
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Josh,

You are right to be giving Little Josh what he needs. As you say, he will need time to see and understand the complexities of this issue.

You comment:

Quote:
Meanwhile, while my perpetrators are the only ones who need any forgiveness, I can't really say when (or if) I'll ever be able to extend any in that direction.
Absolutely right. That was why I used the word "need". You OWE your perps nothing. If forgiving will somehow promote your recovery you might want to consider it at some time in the future. Otherwise, yes, forget it!

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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