I wrote this trying to gain enough currage to post my first post on this web page.
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Pred or Hart?
Pred or Hart?
Which am I?

I have faced the devil inside.
Hurting is not within my nature.
Hateing is not within my nature.
Fearing is within my nature.
Hunting is within my nature.

Do I like becomeing the prey?

Sometimes.
At lest its something,
Some human contact
Even though it hurts,
Even though it kills me
A little more each time.

Am I only meat,
Only Nothing like he said?

What can I say?
I like seing men happy.

I cannot become this,
I cannot live this...
Lie

Annomous sex, prosititution, phone, and cyber
Pritty pictures on the wall
Me being fucked by some dude

I can't go through
I'm not you

Ice burns my heart
And I awake.

----Jonathan (to my brother)

Note: the you mentioned is a close freind of mine who is living a life much worse then I was living. A life with no gult. I saw myself becoming him... and that scared me. I am glad that I backed out before I became like him. He is like a brotherr to me and I hope he finds his way.

Hey Jonathan!! Just a quick note to say I share common feelings from your poem... Seems like I too write poetry with dealing with past shit and how it invades the present... Thanks 4 the energy which I am in need of tonight... All my best, John!!