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#81293 - 05/05/03 03:26 PM Broken
JonathanKhonsu Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 72
Loc: PA
Pain
Haunting
Still.
Seeing lives, myself unraveled.
Seeing past,
Seeing forth,
Hating each moment,
Hating Him.
Darkness passes
Once again.

I am safe
I am loved
No more pain
No more blood

---Jonathan

_________________________
"Ave atque Vale"

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#473953 - 12/23/14 05:06 PM Re: Broken [Re: JonathanKhonsu]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 4770
Loc: O Kanada
very dramatic,
deep and dynamic.
rich with contrasts.
compact and complete.
comes with closure.

great poem.
sad story.
heart break.
happy end.

danger/safety.
tension/release.
start with conflict.
finish with peace.

your signature sent me searching.

thought i would post this in your honour.
from one broken brother to another.
we work together to fix each other.


Brotherly Tears

Through many nations and many seas have I come To carry out these wretched funeral rites, brother, That at last I may give you this final gift in death And that I might speak in vain to silent ashes. Since fortune has borne you, yourself, away from me. Oh, poor brother, snatched unfairly away from me, Now, though, even these, which from antiquity and in the custom of our parents, have been handed down, a gift of sadness in the rites, accept them, flowing with many brotherly tears, And for eternity, my brother, hail and farewell.

-------------
or... if you prefer...
this version.


Driven through many a nation, out over many an ocean, I am now here for these last rites of passing, To offer you, dead brother, the last gifts of the living, To speak in vain at your unspeaking ash Since bitter fortune barred me, stole you to a shadow, Poor brother taken, cruelly taken, from me. But now to celebrate grief in custom of our fathers I bring small foods to you who starve below, Small gifts damp with a brother's tears. Take them and this Into eternity, brother: hail and farewell.


-----------
The Original: written about 50 BC.

Carmen CI

Multas per gentes et multa per aequora vectus advenio has miseras, frater, ad inferias, ut te postremo donarem munere mortis et mutam nequiquam alloquerer cinerem. Quandoquidem fortuna mihi tete abstulit ipsum. Heu miser indigne frater adempte mihi, nunc tamen interea haec, prisco quae more parentum tradita sunt tristi munere ad inferias, accipe fraterno multum manantia fletu, atque in perpetuum, frater, ave atque vale.

Gaius Valerius Catullus
_________________________
Victor|Victim

War
Love
Poetry

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