OK, so this isn't exactly poetry! But I didn't know where else to put this, & I for one think we could stand for a bit of humor around here right about now. At least I could. So I hope someone else can get some laughs out of this. I have...
If you receive an email entitled "Badtimes," delete it immediately. Do not open it.
Apparently, this one is pretty nasty. It will not only erase everything on your hard drive, but it will also delete anything on disks within 20 feet of your computer.
It demagnetizes the stripes on all your credit cards. It reprograms your ATM access code, screws up the tracking on your VCR and uses subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you attempt to play.
If you drive a Ford, it will start missing like a Chevy. It will program your phone auto dial to call only your mother-in-law's number. This virus
will mix antifreeze into your fish tank. It will drink all your beer.
..... are you listening?
It will leave dirty socks on the coffee table when you are expecting company. It will replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine.
It will rewrite your backup files, changing all your active verbs to passive tense and incorporating undetectable misspellings that grossly change the interpretations of key sentences.
If the "Badtimes" message is opened in a Windows 95/98 environment, it will leave the toilet seat up and cause your hair dryer to turn on & off by itself when not plugged in. It will not only remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and pillows, it will also refill your skim milk with whole milk.
PLEASE WARN AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN!
If you don't send this to 5000 people in 20 seconds you'll fart so hard that your right leg will spasm and shoot straight out in front of you, sending sparks that will ignite the person nearest you.
****Please Send, send, send, send, and send!****
Men, watch out for my sparks!...