Therapy

Running from the past
in circles
faster and faster

Looking for a future
through broken glass
what a disaster

Standing in the present
lonely
facing the fear


M. Joseph

Therapy is hard, this poem I sent to my therapist. I thinkk it describes therapy for me very well.

I hope I can contine to handle what therapy brings my way.

MJ
as one who is just starting therapy (2 sessions so far) I feel your poem captured my thoughts, feelings and fear beautifully! Thank you for letting me know once again - I AM NOT ALONE!
Blessings,
Ron

MIKE.....RUNNING FROM THE PAST IN CIRCLES???

YES, OH YES, THATS ALL OF US! THIS IS GREAT. I ADMIRE A PERSON THAT CAN PUT THE PAST IN FRONT OF HIM. YOUR THOUGHTS ARE MY THOUGHTS!

LOOKING FOR A FUTURE THRU BROKEN GLASS....WOW, I REMEMBER LOOKING THRU THAT PORTAL AND SEEING HIM STANDING THERE, JUST AFTER HE KICKED ME IN FRONT OF ALL THOSE PEOPLE, ME GETTING SICK ON A FERRY RIDE, COULDN'T EAT MY DINNER, AND WENT OUT ON DECK TO GET SICK. HIM FOLLOWING ME, SHOUTING AT ME, 'YOU WASTED ALL THAT FOOD, I'LL SHOW YOU', AND THEN A SWIFT KICK FROM MY DAD, THE GUY THAT WAS SUPPOSE TO KEEP YOU FROM HARM, THE GUY THAT WAS SUPPOSE TO GUIDE YOU THRU LIFE WITH LOVE AND UNDERSTANDING, GIVES ME A KICK THAT ALMOST SENT ME OVERBOARD INTO THE BLACK MURKY WATER, ALL THOSE PEOPLE WATCHING AS DAD DID THIS TO HIS ONLY SON. I WAS NEVER SO EMBARRASSED. I STILL SEE PEOPLE LAUGHING AT ME, NO MATTER WHAT I DO, OR SAY, I CAN'T FORGIVE HIM, DAD WHY? DID YOU HATE ME BECAUSE YOU ADOPTED ME AND GAVE ME YOUR NAME? WHY...? NOW YOUR DEAD, SEPT, 1974. ALL IS BLACK NOW. STILL. A SMALL BOX FOR A SMALL MIND. HOW APPEALING. HOW DEMEINING.......


MIKE, I'M SORRY TO WRITE THIS HERE, I GOT CARRIED AWAY WITH YOUR POEM. THANKS FOR THESE LOOKBACKS.

HOW TRUE......
HOW TRUE YOUR WORDS RING OUT. THE MADNESS MUST STOP....

STANDING THERE, FACING YOUR FEARS...ALONE

This poem is very true for me. It is sometimes difficult to see the progress. And progress seems to go to slow.

As a teenanger I broke a window with my fist.
I was mad because my mother would not let me take the car. There was no real reason not to let me use the car.

Therapy is undoing all the crap we went through as a child. And then learning new ways to veiw ourselves.

Just thoughts.

i want my life back that is my goal

Standing in the present facing the fear.

this is the hardest part

there is no easy way through it

it is like jumping blind off a cliff

MJ:

Great poem: Simple & basic, profound & powerful.

I've had years of therapy with a few different T's. I can so relate to these feelings.

"Therapy is undoing all the crap we went through as a child."

Indeed. It is a means of "Standing in the present
lonely facing the fear." Only not as lonely becuz your T is there. Like when I faced down my mother in my T's office in the two-chair therapy.

"And then learning new ways to veiw ourselves."

As the broken pieces of the looking glass into our past start coming together, I see myself better--not just my past self, but my present self & potential future self.

"i want my life back that is my goal"

"Just" being a survivor is of course key to this goal. Sounds to me like you're well on the way in the process of that goal.

Thanks for the poem & the insights you have shared and brot out of the rest of us.

Wuame

I sometimes wonder if therapy is helping.
Deep down I know it is. I have to see all
of me. It has been too long of a ride look-
ing at only the negative things. I need to
focus on the positive more. It is hard.

It has helpped this week,
I am glad for my therapist!!!!!!