I lay there on the cold hard floor, taste dirt and blood in my mouth.
I see him coming closer…
please God, don't let him hurt me anymore
What have I done to deserve something like this?
I try hard to think but I do not know
Is it because I disobeyed my mother?
No, I don't think so.
He stands over me looking down , a look that says "You know what happens now".
I turn away so I can't look into his face and I wonder if his kicks and punches are going to kill me this time, and I wonder if anyone knows how brave I am for taking my moms place.
The pain is so hard to take and I’m so little and his hands are so big…
I start to scream but his hand covers my face, I fight back although he is way stronger then I am. I know that I at least have to try… so through my tears I beg him to stop. Tell him I’ll be good, I’m sorry for whatever I did daddy I promise I won’t do it again I promise I’ll be good daddy I… He tells me to just lie still and shut up.
I tell him it hurts but he doesn’t hear me or care…
He says that I get what I deserve.
I tell him that I’m sorry and that I love him, he only laughs and spits booze on me and pulls off his belt. So defeated I close my eyes and wonder how beautiful the stars are tonight… wishing with all my heart that I could just see their light.

Jay,

Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

Go out this evening and have a look at those stars you wished you could see as a boy. Their beauty is there for you to see tonight and every night now. He can't hurt you anymore.

Much love,
Larry

well you just made me cry you bastard

Jay,

Sorry if I upset you. But sometimes we have things to cry about, don't we? That feeling needs to come out too, just like all the rest.

Much love,
Larry