For the abuser yes, it's all just a game. We meant nothing, we were just a means to get a cheap thrill, a power trip - look, I can even do THIS to a terrified child.
But Jay, that's the past. You are empowered now. You can speak up. You can reject blame and accuse those who hurt you.
And most of all you can heal. You can get your life back on track - you really can. Just hang in there. Sometimes there isn't a lot more to say than this, "Hang in there". I got told that a million times and I never thought it would take me anywhere, but it did, and a lot faster than I thought.
That's not all there is to it, of course. But sometimes when things just look so fucked up, that's what we need to remember.
So....hang in there.