I feel the blood flowing through my veins shredding my black heart to pieces, flowing out of me and into your soul. This is what you live for and what I die for.
How can you beat me down and tell me I’m nothing when you don't even know who I am, when everything I am and everything I do and all that I’ve given is for you.
You ask me if I’m still breathing... Am I?
I can see the evil in you... it gleams in your eyes. I can hear your voice but I don’t want to listen. Strap me down and tell me everything will be all right, I trust you completely because you're all I have. What exactly am I supposed to do now that I’ve Let you beat me, can we play another game? Maybe I could win this time.
If I try to look away, will you kill me this time?
It doesn’t really seem that you’re getting through to me, you’re getting madder even though I’m weeping so sweetly. I think I’m breaking down but you are just beginning.
I can see the sickness arising in you, violently... there’s no turning back now.
Bring on the violence, it’s significant in my life. Bleeding now, I’m crying out, I’m falling down and I’m feeling nothing. Laughing now, you’re not stopping anytime soon, I’m reaching out and I feel nothing. You were wrong to take it from me and leave me feeling nothing. Crawling now, I’m beaten down, I’m tortured now and I’m feeling nothing. Hunted now, you’re stalking now, you’re killing me but I’m feeling nothing.
I can feel you ripping and tearing, feeding and growing inside of me.... yet I feel nothing.
I need this more than you can know.
Please give it back to me.

Jay,

Absolutely harrowing. And I remember the feeling...feeling nothing anymore, just waiting for it to end. Just keep talking my friend.

Much love,
Larry

jaysen,

i read all the work you posted here.
this one i like best, rhythm, words and emotions. truly beautiful. they all are.
i do hear a little bit of maynard's style in yours. which is a huge compliment because as you well know maynard rocks.
i never commented on your sig, did i? 'the patient' is one amazing song of an outstanding album. and i can easily see how you identify.
it looks like you're working a lot. processing a lot of what has happened. a lot of 'stepping through the shadow', to stay with the tool-references. and i do believe that you will come out on the other side.
i'm very impressed with all these poems.

Thanks, it helps a lot to share my thoughts/feelings this way. Like I told you before, music is my medicine... there are things you can scream into the mic. that you wouldn't normally say in a regular conversation... as you know. Glad you picked up on the 'Tool' references, one of my favorite bands