This thread was so good I had to join in. I am new here and have been searching a long while for someplace I can be myself and also explore avenues for healing such as spirituality, with others. This site has got everything! I am so happy to have found it...here is a fave quote from one of my most beloved spiritual teachers--Vernon Howard....
Troubled human beings have everything exactly backward.
They think that by winning they can stop fighting. The
opposite is true. By ceasing to fight, you win - but
what you win is superior and different from what was
imagined. A man believes he can end the terrible inner
battle by winning wealth or power or endless sexual
experiences. If winning them he is dismayed to find
that the battle is not over; he must continue the weary
fight. His despair is overwhelming, for his dream has
turned into a nightmare of compulsive craving.
Stop fighting and you win.
Stop fighting and you end the illusion that you must win.
You have already won, but you do not understand what this
means. Find out."