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#76721 - 02/23/03 01:47 PM Release
Wuamei Offline
Member

Registered: 08/19/02
Posts: 2700
Loc: The left turn I should have ta...
Today I am really sick and missed church today; probably won't be on here much either. But I had to share this. I listened to most of "America at Worship" (I admit I "slept in church" some \:o !), two hours covering briefly excerpts of about 7 worship services. Incredibly every one of them, all different denominations, were good, uplifting & relevant. Really gives me hope for the church.

In particular, Rev. Jeremiah Wright of Trinity United Church of Christ in Chicago preached about the importance of "Review, Release, and Renewal." Kinda what I've been doing thru therapy.

Rev. Wright told about a woman (call her Sarah)who had been sabotaging every relationship she got into. Always something wrong with the other person, something missing from their relationship. Even with her husband & children when she got married & started a family of her own.

Thru therapy Sarah, in "Reviewing" her life, recalled an incident at school. On some isolated back steps between classes a teacher she had a nine year old's crush on stalked her & sexually abused her, threatening to kill her if she ever told anybody.

Sarah was punished by the school for not running the between class errand she had been on, and for not returning to class that day. Then her parents punished her. She was unable to say a word in her own defense. All those she trusted to protect her punished her and let her down.

No wonder Sarah could not trust, could not let anybody get close, and pushed people away by sabotaging the relationship when they did. She did not want to get hurt or abused ever again.

Does any of this sound familiar?...

In therapy, Sarah went thru a process of
"Release." Her T had her go back to that terrible time, after the teacher abused & threatened her. She was again sitting on the steps crying, afraid to go anywhere or see anyone or do anything.

Only this time she in therapy pictures Jesus coming down the steps to her. At the T's urging, she lets Jesus sit with her on the steps and cry with her. Then she lets Him put his arm around her and comfort her.

Thus Sarah was able to release all the hurt, pain,
anger, bitterness, and suspicion. She was able to begin the process of the "Renewal" of her life. She restored her marriage & family life, and first & foremost herself.

Of course some of us prefer other types of therapy
and ways to work thru abuse memories as they come to us in order to renew our lives.

Some might use some form of the above-mentioned visualization therapy but focus on a different event or vision. One might choose to see another religious figure than Jesus, someone we look up to, a family member or friend we can trust. We may choose to see ourselves as healing adults, there on those steps comforting, loving & reparenting that abused child who is still with & within us.

This message was powerful & helpful for me. Reminded me of something I'd already read about & been encouraged to do. Now it's time to review that book and my life, do some healthy releasing, and take further steps in renewing my life.

Victor

_________________________
"I can't stand pain. It hurts me."
--Daffy Duck

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#76722 - 02/23/03 02:06 PM Re: Release
Mike Church Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 01/23/03
Posts: 3439
Loc: Toronto, Canada
VICTOR:
You cannot begin to understand the emotional highs I get from your posts. It is hard to stay down when I read them. I am an emotional kind of guy now after soooo many years of holding it all in. Someday my brother I want to meet you and shake your hand.
You said
Of course some of us prefer other types of therapy
and ways to work thru abuse memories as they come to us in order to renew our lives.
This may be difficult to understand but, in my case, dealing and healing have swung a bit to the SHIT HAPPENS but BY GOD it is NOT GOING TO RUN THE LAST QUARTER OF MY LIFE as it has in the past. The more I do kid stuff that I really believed was not what I was entitled to the more I feel that the two of us are getting a good grip on things. MY T is great, my wife and daughter are great, my close friends are great, but most of all YOU Vicy

Some might use some form of the above-mentioned visualization therapy but focus on a different event or vision. One might choose to see another religious figure than Jesus, someone we look up to, a family member or friend we can trust. We may choose to see ourselves as healing adults, there on those steps comforting, loving & reparenting that abused child who is still with & within us.

This message was powerful & helpful for me. Reminded me of something I'd already read about & been encouraged to do. Now it's time to review that book and my life, do some healthy releasing, and take further steps in renewing my life.
And you are so right. Each of us have used different methods for release. I can say quite truthfully that while I did dl my own thing for a long time I find that I am taking a Heinz 57 approch to the whole thing.
As an ADHD'er I need variety and I have found coming here is kind of like going to a really great buffet. Try a little of this and a little of that. Now there is no one way for me. And no more of myway or highway. LIfe is starting to get better for me. My T is great, my wife and daughter are great, my good buddies are great and have all helped immensly now that I let them. But of all the help and gentle pressure I get I can truthfully say that it is YOU Victor and all my BROTHERS that have given me the kind of support that has had the most impact. I really feel helpless when one of us is struggling and I always want so much to help. When you are having fun it is truly infectuous.
Take Care ALL OF YOU AND BE GENTLE TO YOURSELF>

_________________________
Mikey

IT REALLY IS OK TO STUMBLE. NONE OF US ARE PERFECT.

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#76723 - 02/23/03 03:08 PM Re: Release
Chey-Wy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/01/02
Posts: 241
Loc: Cheyenne, WY
Victor,

Let me start by saying that I hope you are feeling better. Nothing serious I hope.

Quote:
In particular, Rev. Jeremiah Wright of Trinity United Church of Christ in Chicago preached about the importance of "Review, Release, and Renewal." Kinda what I've been doing thru therapy.
I was wondering if you knew where I could get a tran>
_________________________
From the Song MOUNTAINS by Lonestar.

Yeah, the good Lord gave us mountains,
So we could learn how to climb

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#76724 - 02/24/03 01:42 PM Re: Release
Mike Church Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 01/23/03
Posts: 3439
Loc: Toronto, Canada
What a wonderful person Janet is and how lucky here parishioners are. When you find people like that let em in because they show the true face of huminty. Tears again, So sorry!!!!

_________________________
Mikey

IT REALLY IS OK TO STUMBLE. NONE OF US ARE PERFECT.

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#76725 - 02/24/03 02:21 PM Re: Release
Wuamei Offline
Member

Registered: 08/19/02
Posts: 2700
Loc: The left turn I should have ta...
Mike:

Thanks for your encouraging words. Your enthusiasm is a big boost to me and to all our brothers here. I relate to you, as I am OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) and also like to experiment with a lot of different tools & methods.

John:

Still pretty sick but a bit better thanks. Wife stayed home today too, unusual for her, but kinda nice, except I hurt for her when she's sick. My problem is my fibro weakens my immune system & it can take a long time to get rid of a bug. But even to this I won't back down! Perps or flus--all kinds of bugs can be squashed!

As to the tran>
_________________________
"I can't stand pain. It hurts me."
--Daffy Duck

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#76726 - 02/26/03 02:44 AM Re: Release
RickL Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/16/02
Posts: 84
Loc: Oregon
When our parents fail us in their role of "God" (since as small children we look at our parents that way), it seems perfectly reasonable to me that we draw "God" into the picture for dealing with the painful experiences our inner children all remember.

Whether this comes in the form of visualizing Jesus intervening on that little guy's behalf, or visualizing ourselves as loving adults to the child we were, it's still "God" to the little child. And the little child needed/needs a "God" who is love and advocates totally for us. Or some can see and capture the thought of God as Spirit, Love, not embodied in a human form necessarily. To me, any of the above are legitimate in dealing with painful memories from the past. Let God, or your Higher Power, touch your consciousness in the way that is best for you.

Rick


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#76727 - 03/03/03 06:58 PM Re: Release
moo2 Offline
Member

Registered: 01/31/03
Posts: 82
Loc: pottsboro,texas
Victor,
we all need to truly realize that Jesus will share that pain. Jesus bore ALL THE SINS OF THE ENTIRE EARTH. No matter how much pain you bore as victims of rape, no matter how many times it happened our Lord + Savior has felt all our pain. It is a huge step to accept that Christ is will comfort us when we let Him. My sign off note [WIRH MUCH LOVE] is truly IN CHRIST'S NAME. My Pastor had explained with preaching that that is what IN CHRIST'S NAME means + it shows that I am putting my full trust in my Lord. I pray everyday that Mr Edd will too. I have to go.
WITH MUCH LOVE,
Kim \:\) :p \:\) :rolleyes: :p \:\)


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