I'm not sure what scares me more... someone reading this and replying or nobody reading it at all... I've only been here for two days and in those two days I've seen more courage than I ever have in all my life. With that said, you guys have motivated me to try and get this out. I've never told my story to anyone before. I made a report to the police but never went into any details or much of the story at all.

So here it is, just part of it, in general...

I'm hoping and praying that little by little if maybe I get it out, just a little bit... maybe it'll be another step for me to really start to heal.

Here goes...

I was 15 going on 16 and at a friends house that night. His parents were away for the weekend so was having a mad party with a ton of people.. our friends, their friends, etc. I had a great time.. I drank a lot, smoked a lot, took some drugs here and there. I should have just slept over his house but I felt an urgency to get home as I'd told my father that I'd be home that night to help him with some things early next Saturday morning. It wasn't too late but I was so wasted I could barely walk.... An older guy approached me, told me who he was... thinking back I can't remember what he said, something like "my name is xxxxx I'm a friend of xxxx's, etc, etc..." I remember him saying he would give me a ride home, he lived (somewhere)near me and was going the same way, that he knew me from his younger brother going to school with me, blah, blah, blah... he seemed cool enough and I was so drunk and high it didn't really matter. I was just happy that I didn't have to walk.

I remember getting into his car, I remember there were two more guys, his friends I guess already in the back seat. I remember one of them grabbing me from behind, putting something over my mouth and nose...

I woke up in someone's basement... didn't know how I got there, how long I'd been there. I was hanging from something.. my hands were numb, I realized I was bleeding and sore all over, I realized I was gagged, I realized my clothes were gone... I started to panic..

I have to stop here.

Jay