For some reason, even tho I am a member, I cannot reply to member posts...so here goes...I understand your anger and pain...I almost went after a priest who was not even MY perp...finally got some help and meds to help me deal with my post traumatic stress disorder. Dude, you are a military man and you know the impact of PTSD...same with us survivors. Don't do anything that will only hurt you...I have done the self-destruct routine with sex and drugs...here I am a married man and I have pedalled my ass around more than I can remember...abusing myself and risking my health, job, family...life. Take my advice and if you are not getting help, get some. You deserve it. You are among people who understand.
I survive, one day at a time...knowing that I now can accept the things that cannot be changed, change the things I can and find the wisdom to know the difference.