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#74422 - 01/16/03 08:13 PM What books would you suggest?
Mark S Offline
Member

Registered: 08/25/02
Posts: 130
Loc: England
Hi everyone.

I'm looking for some suggestions as to which books to add to the couple I already have.

I looked through the books linked to this site the other day and most seemed to be geared towards survivors of childhood sexual abuse. Whilst I have got and read 'Victims No Longer' by Mike Lew, I would like to read something more in line with adult survivors of rapes/abuse. Even though I was 17 and 19 when I was raped/abused, due to it's nature of I did find Lews book both helpful and informative.

Oh by the way I also have 'Male on Male Rape' by Michael Scarce.

Any ideas anyone?

Mark


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#74423 - 01/16/03 10:17 PM Re: What books would you suggest?
Wuamei Offline
Member

Registered: 08/19/02
Posts: 2700
Loc: The left turn I should have ta...
Try Mike Lew's second book, which I have, "Leaping Upon the Mountains." It is geared to male survivors in general, whenever the abuse happened, and offers lots of practical helps & encouragement.

Anyone else have any other suggestions? Maybe something you've read?

Victor

_________________________
"I can't stand pain. It hurts me."
--Daffy Duck

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#74424 - 01/17/03 02:42 PM Re: What books would you suggest?
Mark S Offline
Member

Registered: 08/25/02
Posts: 130
Loc: England
Thanks Victor.

I've cheecked with Amazon over here in the U.K. and it's availiable, so I'll be putting in my order over the weekend. (Not all books that are availiable in the U.S. are avaliable over here. It can be damn anoying).

By the way I like the new name. Anyone else have any recomemndations?

Mark ;\)


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#74425 - 01/17/03 04:06 PM Re: What books would you suggest?
Archnut Offline
Member

Registered: 10/26/02
Posts: 343
Loc: United Kingdom
Hi Mark

The book that helped me the most was
Mic Hunters:

Abused boys: The neglected victims of sexual abuse.

This book changed my life and attitudes towards myself and in turn helped me get rid of a hell of a lot of guilt.

Take care

Kirk (Archnut)


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#74426 - 01/17/03 04:53 PM Re: What books would you suggest?
Wuamei Offline
Member

Registered: 08/19/02
Posts: 2700
Loc: The left turn I should have ta...
Thanks Mark.

You might be surprised to find that many of the books out there that seem geared more toward men abused as boys could also be very helpful to those abused as men.

A case in point is the book Kirk mentioned by Mic Hunter, and also "Betrayed as Boys" by our Prez Richard Gartner. While I have yet to purchase & read either of those (they're on my wish list!) I've read enuf excerpts, heard enuf about them, and know enuf about the authors to be confident of this.

"The Male Survivor: The Impact of Sexual Abuse" by Matthew P. Mendel was also helpful to me. While it has more studies & statistics than stories or practical stuff, I found those to be surprisingly practical & helpful & affirming.

Any other recommendations out there? Anyone know of any books specifically for male survivors of SA as an adult?

Meanwhile I'll keep searching as I'm able...

Hope that helps Mark.

Victor

_________________________
"I can't stand pain. It hurts me."
--Daffy Duck

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#74427 - 01/17/03 05:05 PM Re: What books would you suggest?
Mark S Offline
Member

Registered: 08/25/02
Posts: 130
Loc: England
Thanks guys.

Victor.

I think you may be right, I certainly found the book 'Victims No Longer' very helpful, it is primarily aimed at survivors of childhood sexual abuse but much of it hit me as appropriate to my experience and recovery.

Kirk.

Mic Hunter is supposed to be a very accomplished writer, the charity which helped me has him as their president, odd when you think he is from the U.S. I suppose it reflects on where the wealth of knowledge on surviving abuse is.

I can see I'm going to have to do some serious saving. I get so much out of reading, for so long I felt a freak where my abuse was concerned as if I were the only person it had ever happened too. Whilst in some ways I wish that were true, reading peoples accounts of how they feel, cope with their abuse, whether in book form or on this site has helped me so much.

Thanks again.

Mark ;\)


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#74428 - 01/19/03 08:55 AM Re: What books would you suggest?
Richard Gartner, PhD Offline
Past President
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/20/00
Posts: 404
Loc: New York, NY, USA
Other than the book by Michael Scarce, the only book I know of specifically geared to the rape of adult men is actually from Britain, and is entitled "Male Victims of Sexual Assault." Edited by Mezey and King, it was published in 1992 by the Oxford University Press. I haven't looked at it in a long time and don't recall what it is like, but I do know it was quite expensive, at least in the U.S. Perhaps you can get a used copy over there if the cost is high. (Actually, I don't even know if it is still on print.)

Richard Gartner

_________________________
www.richardgartner.com

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#74429 - 01/19/03 04:00 PM Re: What books would you suggest?
Mark S Offline
Member

Registered: 08/25/02
Posts: 130
Loc: England
Thank you Richard.

I have checked with Amazon U.K. it is still availiable but only in hardback form. You were right it is expensive though.

I have been encouraged, over the last couple of years to write a book myself. Initially it was more due to the nature of my disability not due to my abuse at all. I have started it and have had some positive feedback. Maybe I should write two books the other more focussed on being a survivor of adult abuse. I had to have the Michael Scarse book imoported from the states as it wasn't availiable over here and I was desperate for validation. That worked out VERY expensive too, but was money well spent. There certainly seems to be a opening for books on surviving adult abuse.

Mark


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#74430 - 01/19/03 08:47 PM Re: What books would you suggest?
Wuamei Offline
Member

Registered: 08/19/02
Posts: 2700
Loc: The left turn I should have ta...
Speaking as a fellow aspiring writer, Mark--go for it!

Victor

_________________________
"I can't stand pain. It hurts me."
--Daffy Duck

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#74431 - 01/19/03 11:32 PM Re: What books would you suggest?
Wuamei Offline
Member

Registered: 08/19/02
Posts: 2700
Loc: The left turn I should have ta...
Mark, I found another book that might be helpful, not only for you but for your SO's, which you can get thru MS & Amazon.com:

"If He Is Raped: A Guidebook for Parents, Mates and Friends", by Alan W. McEvoy (Editor), Jeff D. Brookings (Editor), Debbie Rollo (Editor).

I don't know if it discusses specifically men raped as adults, but I do know it discusses male adolescents who were raped.

Anyway, it might be worth looking into.

Take care

Victor

_________________________
"I can't stand pain. It hurts me."
--Daffy Duck

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