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#71876 - 07/02/03 05:23 PM Re: Wondering about sex - trigger
isign2u Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 07/02/03
Posts: 2
Loc: southeast USA
I am very new to this (today first). I am amazed that I can talk about whatever bothers me here. I was 13 when 2 men raped me repeatedly one summer afternoon. Now 27 years later I am finally dealing with all the issues. I am Deaf so you can only imagine how hard it is to find someone that you can talk to. I have never wanted to have a hearing Dr. go through an interpreter to address these issues. I have lied to my medical Dr. in order to receive Paxal and amitripline (4years).
Now I am gaining ground and hope to be a more happy person.
Thanks for the opportunity to vent.

_________________________
The only thing the Deaf can not do is hear.

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#71877 - 07/02/03 06:19 PM Re: Wondering about sex - trigger
dwf Offline
Moderator/BoD Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/24/03
Posts: 1223
Loc: Austin, Texas USA
Welcome isign2u,

That is a horrifying thing that you have lived through. I am so sorry that you had to suffer such violation.

It makes me very glad that in light of what happened, you have found this place. I hope you will join with us as we each try in our own way to seek to recover the light and love that is our natural birthright.

I'm glad that you're here and look forward to hearing more from you.

Dear Bob,

Quote:
What I do know is that I think the men here are really great men. I find all of us, me included, to be likeable and loveable men.
Thanks for one of the loveliest, most sensitive pieces i have read in a long time.

I agree, especially with the part about you, the Dean, being a very likeable and most loveable man.

Your words will comfort me beyond today.

Your partner in recovery,

_________________________
"Poke salad Annie, 'gators got you granny
Everybody said it was a shame
'Cause her mama was aworkin' on the chain-gang"

-Tony Joe White

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#71878 - 07/02/03 07:41 PM Re: Wondering about sex - trigger
outis Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/27/03
Posts: 2260
Loc: Maryland USA
isign2u,

Welcome to MaleSurvivor. I am saddened that you need to be here, but I think you'll find this is a good place to be. There are a lot of folks here that will show honest care and concern.

Later,

Joe

_________________________
"Telemachos, your guest is no discredit to you. I wasted no time in stringing the bow, and I did not miss the mark. My strength is yet unbroken…"—The Odyssey, translated by W.H.D. Rouse

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#71879 - 07/02/03 10:05 PM Re: Wondering about sex - trigger
MEC Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/14/03
Posts: 62
Loc: NJ
Hey Brothers,
Thanks for the kindness and straight shooting. The Dean, you shed some new light on this for me as did all. I think the most rewarding thing I take from MS is knowing I'm not alone or crazy.

After I posted, I had some regrets in doing it, making the post. But now I'm glad I was able to put it out there giving it away instead of festering with the rest of my 'secrets'.

isign2u, thanks for being here and putting my pettiness in its proper place. I work for a subsidiary of the Mental Health Association and I used to find myself feeling bad about ME, until someone with real problems comes for an appointment and puts things in perspective for me.

I hope you can find happiness here, many of us have. We're all here to listen to you. Please feel comfortable in talking freely. As you can see by this post, nothing you can say will shock anyone.

Danny and WhyMe, you both are so wise and things you've said here and elsewhere I could relate to very much.

Thanks all!
Michael

_________________________
Michael

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#71880 - 07/07/03 06:31 PM Re: Wondering about sex - trigger
isign2u Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 07/02/03
Posts: 2
Loc: southeast USA
Well I have finely started the steps of recovery (I guess). I told a very good friend everything this weekend. Yes, everything! It took a few hours and a few tears. But I know now that CAN do more than hold all this inside.
After telling “Shelly” all about what had happened to me when I was young I told her that I am Bi-sexual and she was more taken back by that than anything. After a long discussion she told be of how her husband had been abused but he never has told anyone other than her. He experiences bouts of deep depression and attacks of impending doom.
I know now that if I had not held all this inside for so long I may have been very different in my life. I could have built some great relationships that could have become great things or ended on a note of something other than broken exogamy.
I know that I face many challenges days ahead but now I see the light at the end of the tunnel and not a dark and bottomless pit that I faced before. If you can help someone by facing your own fears, then you are far braver than any warrior that has ever gone to battle against a foe that the eye can see.
Be strong, for tomorrow we can live.

_________________________
The only thing the Deaf can not do is hear.

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