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#70180 - 05/13/06 05:56 AM Scared
yesac76 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/23/04
Posts: 508
Loc: Idaho
Just when I thought it was safe to face life, I have finally accepted that I am a gay man. I have begun to come out, to a couple select people. I am scared and stressed, but I feel I am doing the right thing.

_________________________
"You live it or lie it" Metallica

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#70181 - 05/13/06 06:13 AM Re: Scared
ScottyTodd Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 02/12/03
Posts: 1561
Loc: Pennsylvania
yesac76 - When we move out into new territory there is risk and with risk comes fear/scared. The most important thing is you accept yourself for who you are! It doesn't really matter what anyone else says because THEY can not CHANGE YOU! As you get more comfortable with yourself and realize "I am okay!" perhaps your fear and anxiety will lessen. I hope you find the peace that finding oneself can bring!!

Howard

_________________________
If you think you can or you can't - you're right!.......anon
It's never too late to have a happy childhood!.....anon
You're very normal for the abnormal situation you've been through..............S. Todd

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#70182 - 05/13/06 01:37 PM Re: Scared
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
yesac,

We are who we are, whatever our sexual or other orientations, and if we ever expect to be happy the journey has to start from that fact. I hope you will learn to love yourself in all your dimensions, including your gay sexuality. If others find that difficult to accept, it's their loss and not yours.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#70183 - 05/13/06 02:57 PM Re: Scared
george of kent Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/28/05
Posts: 305
Loc: delaware
Yesac,
You are doing the right thing. Acknowledging and accepting one's own truth is fully liberating and when I was able to be that honest with myself it felt like the weight of the whole world was removed from my shoulders.
Scared is ok. Your road ahead will not always be smooth and easy. But the journey will become more satisfying, more joyful, more life affirming as you now progress along.
Congratulations!!!
Love, etc.,

_________________________
"We are only two and yet our howling can encircle the world's end.
Frightened, you are my only friend.
And frightened we are, every one.
Someone must take a stand -- Coward, take my coward's hand"
Arthur Laurents

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#70184 - 05/13/06 03:45 PM Re: Scared
markgreyblue Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 5400
Loc: Pasadena, CA
yesac -

it is so good to accept all the things about your self - and it is a relief - that i can say

i am gay -

quotes:
"
whatever our sexual or other orientations, and if we ever expect to be happy the journey has to start from that fact. I hope you will learn to love yourself in all your dimensions, including your gay sexuality. If others find that difficult to accept, it's their loss and not yours.
"
Scared is ok. Your road ahead will not always be smooth and easy. But the journey will become more satisfying, more joyful, more life affirming as you now progress along.


right on!

mgb \:\)

_________________________
"...do not look outside yourself for the leader."
-wisdom of the hopi elders

"...the sign of a true leader is service..." - anonymous



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#70185 - 05/14/06 11:17 AM Re: Scared
sophiesdad Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/30/05
Posts: 462
Loc: Florida
Yesac:

If we all went thru life doing what is "safe", we would end up the most boring people on earth. There is no growth without fear and stepping out of our comfort zones. You have made a tremendous step - make sure that you pat yourself on the back for it.

As to your friends who are chosen to know - if they stay with you, then they are true friends. If they reject you, then they never belonged in your life in the first place. You will end up making new friends and fostering new relationships with people who will support you through the trials and tribulations of life.

The most important thing for you (and all of us regardless of who or what we are) is to learn to love and appreciate yourself. If we spin our wheels struggling with the things we dislike or are ashamed about, then we can't move forward. Easier said than done, but you've made a huge effort to live a life true to yourself.

To paraphrase Hellen Keller: "Be careful not to stay focused on the door in your life that has closed behind you, lest you miss the new ones which have opened ahead."

_________________________
There are no unresolved issues - they just didn't resolve themselves the way we would have liked. "Grinder and Bandler - Neuro-Linguistic Programming"

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