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#70067 - 04/07/06 01:33 PM finding it hard to stay positive
markgreyblue Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 5400
Loc: Pasadena, CA
right at this moment i am finding it hard to stay positive - i am seeing cause and effect over and over - but again the world is growing colder - the heart - dimmer -

and my past more real - in a lot of ways -

my father's limitation - and perhaps real badness is so terrible -

a man with so much - yet only loves that - and cannot appreciate any other -

he says what he wants - and that's all -

but that is not my care -

my care is now making this life work -

i have a process of uncovering who i am - my limitations - and maybe the limitation of society to see potential in me -

the biggest mistake - was thinking to work FOR somebody again -

stupid -never again -

I need a job - and maybe will get one - but the real issue is working for myself now -

and what do i have to sell - i will not go down that dark road - at this moment -

but I think perhaps - an art gallery will be where i shall go next - for representation -
and maybe UT -
a design firm studio -
et al...

Anyways- I will keep workign - the more i know of myself - and what i can do it's driving me -

m

_________________________
"...do not look outside yourself for the leader."
-wisdom of the hopi elders

"...the sign of a true leader is service..." - anonymous



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#70068 - 04/07/06 08:08 PM Re: finding it hard to stay positive
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Mark,

I think the next thing you should look into is the gallery. Not just go out and buy one or rent one. Look into it.

Do you have good contacts, for example? What investment would be required? What can you do that would be ***different***.

I would say be ambitious and yet realistic, but don't be dissuaded easily. I think we can achieve so much more if we look at our feelings of dissatisfaction as a challenge, rather than as an advance proof of failure.

If it was easy, who would want to do it??? ;\)

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#70069 - 04/08/06 04:00 AM Re: finding it hard to stay positive
markgreyblue Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 5400
Loc: Pasadena, CA
thanks Larry \:\)

_________________________
"...do not look outside yourself for the leader."
-wisdom of the hopi elders

"...the sign of a true leader is service..." - anonymous



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#70070 - 04/08/06 04:06 PM Re: finding it hard to stay positive
michael Joseph Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/11/01
Posts: 2719
Loc: Virginia
Hugs Mark, I think it is a good idea!!!!!!!!

Like me talking to others about teaching and other things to do with my Masters even though I have the misdemeanor. I am talking to a local director at the college to see if she has any former teachers that might know what I could do.
Or someone at a college in PA.

We looked at one of our choices for city to live in, hope you are feeling better mark.

Hugs to you too Larry!!!

MJ

_________________________
Standing together is so much better than hiding in the dark.
***I am a three time WoR Retreat Alumni***
The Round Table, Men's CSA Group, Monday 7:30pm CST, MaleSurvivor Chat

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#70071 - 04/09/06 12:42 PM Re: finding it hard to stay positive
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Mark,

How about something else art related, something that would click in Tornto but which just doesn't exist there yet? A book store focused on the arts? A gay community shop where gays could get relevant mags, books, cards, snacks, Tshirts, sit and have a coffee, maybe arrange a small lecture, have a community bulletin board, etc. I know there must be a place like this already on Church Street (correct name?), but check them out and see what you can do that's new and better.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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