I guess this is where to put this...

I know that there has been a thread similar to this before, but this is something I've been struggling with for a while.

After figuring out my sexuality, I've been trying to figure out what that means, exactly, beyond being attracted to men.

I'm not even sure there IS any particular meaning other than as a label of convenience.

Any comments or thoughts would be appreciated.

i am not sure why there is a need to look for putting a meaning on being physically attracted to men -

society in some countries supports us and so it is normalized -and others it is not -yet - and so there may be a sense of illegitmacy - which is far from the truth -

it means nothing more than that we are -

and your romantic life is but a part of your life -

who you date - or marry is just a part of you and your life -

we do not have a big socio- historical - cutlural - acknowldedgement of gayness -
in a way that supports the vast majority of us
in our awakening to ourselves and in our daily life - but-

it's gotten a lot better-

staying happy in life and surviving - and working and loving - are still the most important challenges we have just like any others -

so ((((dewey))))

embrace yourself it's ok!
m

Mark, all,

Just to clarify the question, what does being gay mean ASIDE from being attracted to men? Anything in particular?

I don't know what you mean?

historically we have been a very creative and productive part of society

Alexander the Great - who first spread culture and theatre around the mediterranean and europe-

leonardo da vinci

michelangelo

william shakespeare

ian mckellen

abraham lincoln

the list goes on....

you can be very proud of yourself for being
part of distinguished list of
contributors to our society,
history, culture, and everyone's lives.

Maybe I don't know how to frame the question correctly. I'll come back to this.

Socrates,

Nureyev

James Dean

countless business people, executives

David Souter - one of the US Supreme court justices.

amd so on....

Look it up in an encyclopedia britannica .

I am serious.

M

and for athletes like yourself -
there are a huge huge number -

Carl Lewis

Greg Louganis

all walks of life...

m

I must admit Dewey - your line of questions really pisses me off -

If you're looking for something to hate about youself I will take no part in that

-

that is not a healing or part of a healing attitude -

it's part of the abuse mentality that was laid upon us -

- if you are interested in gender studies or gay studies -

the San Francisco Publice library has a marvelous and one of the first of it's kind gay studies section -a big beautiful section of the library -

that you can go to and look at - and learn - as much as you need -

peace dude -

mark

Mark, it seems you took things to a dark side when in fact, I think Dewey is looking for something to love about his gayness beyond the sexuality part of it.

I think I am in a similar place. I don't hate myself nor do I want to but I too am looking for meaning about being gay beyond sex.

Since I work in the cultural/historical arena (museums) I have been adamant about providing more opportunities provide gay audiences - both in and out of the closet - more positive messages about what gay life can be.

I am working toward (I think, though I don't know this for sure yet) helping to establish a more significant presence for GLBT history and culture than the SF library section. I envision a place that addresses how societies around the world and historically have dealt with queer communities ("queer" by the way, is not meant to be negative - it's an acceptable term in academia).

Anyway, seems to me the list that MGB started is a key to finding a way to embrace our community of gay men historically and that is helpful.

We need more positive places to reflect on what "gay" means, exactly. Not negatively, but what purpose can we serve in a balanced and just world. I think the story of Silo and Roy (the gay penguins) moves us in that direction.

Best,
john