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#69555 - 01/22/06 09:53 PM Re: My Rape Survivor Story
nivekld75 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 10
Loc: Idaho
Can someone tell me how to unsubscribe from this board and all correspondence affiliated with it?

_________________________
HE SAID IT, I BELIEVE IT, THAT SETTLES IT!!!
Kev
Rape Survivor

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#69556 - 01/23/06 05:15 AM Re: My Rape Survivor Story
WalkingSouth Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 16264
nivekld,

I'm not sure what happened there in this thread but it appears something bothered you a great deal. If you want to report a post simply click the little whistle icon below the post you want to report and state your case in the resulting form that appears. The mods will be able to handle your request and take any action necessary.

I'm not a mod, so cannot do anything other than offer advise on how you can get your request fulfilled.

Again, I'm sorry for anything that happened you feel is inappropriate.

Keep safe,

John

_________________________
“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ‘Holy ____…! What a ride!’” ~Hunter S. Thompson

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#69557 - 01/24/06 07:13 AM Re: My Rape Survivor Story
Thad Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/28/01
Posts: 1752
Loc: Oakland, CA
Hey, Kev
I read your story and I am so sorry for what happened - I also wanted to let you know that I was concerned with your being upset with the use of the term "sister" - I think it was used as a slang term that I have often heard among Gay survivors - and I feel sure Dominic meant no harm by it - it sounded like it triggered something for you that you found upsetting.

I wanted to say that you made a big step coming here to talk about what happened to you. It is a very big step in the road to healing the trauma you have endured - these guys can give you some support that you will probably not find many other places - I hope you can take time to look at what was upsetting to you and perhaps even talk or post about it -

If want to talk some more with me, feel free to Personal message me. I hope you will stay, though since we clearly need your voice here and I believe you will learn much from us.

Thad
MS site administrator

_________________________
"..this place isn't a discussion forum..it's a portal..." Lupin
"The truth will set you free, but first it will probably piss you off." dwf's AA sponsor.

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#69558 - 01/24/06 08:01 AM Re: My Rape Survivor Story
nivekld75 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 10
Loc: Idaho
-

_________________________
HE SAID IT, I BELIEVE IT, THAT SETTLES IT!!!
Kev
Rape Survivor

Top
#69559 - 01/24/06 09:23 AM Re: My Rape Survivor Story
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Kev,

I too hope you will stick around and see what the site has to offer. There really isn't anything else like it.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#69560 - 01/26/06 06:21 AM Re: My Rape Survivor Story
lostcowboy Offline
Member

Registered: 11/10/04
Posts: 797
Loc: North Texas
Hi Nivekid75, hope you decide to stay. But about removing yourself from the board. In the my profile link, you can go into preference, and Block PM's, if that is what is bothering you, you can also fix it so you don't get a email sent to you when someone replies to your message. If you would still like to look at the board, but don't want anyone to know that you are on the board, just logout of the board. You can still read, but people will not know that you are on the board. You have to be logged in to post though. If you really want to be removed from the board, just send the webmaster a email, I am sure he will remove you.

However, it would be a shame for you to leave, so soon after getting here.

About being triggered, I have been triggered three times since being here. In all three cases it was me triggering myself, after calming down and rereading what had been said. I tend to be a bit paranoid and homophobic. You may be wondering why I am reading the gay section, it helps me to see gay people, as people. I was raped at 11 and never told anyone about it for a long time, never even read any books on rape. Every raped person has these thoughts go through their head. Why me, what did I do to cause this to happen to me! You blame yourself, instead of him. In my case, I thought for a while that I must of did something to make him think that I was a girl, (only girls are raped, my rape happened in 1968), a few years later I first heard of homosexuals, (oh, that's why it happened, he wanted me, but did not care about my feelings or wants), that theory lasted for a long time. In 1992, I was basically kicked out of the navy, for telling them about the rape, I got a honorable discharge and money, but I was basically kicked out. Only then did I read a book on rape, and find out that, at the time the book came out that 80% of the men caught for raping men were straight men. In Nov 2004, when I found this site, I also found this web page. http://www.rapecrisiscenter.com/education_articles_007.htm Which says the percent is 98%. So intelligently I know that it was very likely a straight guy who raped me, and it was not about sex. But way down deep in my gut I have a hard time understanding that. Oh here is the rape book that I read. Recovery by Helen Benedict

Take care,
Lostcowboy

_________________________
"Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow. Don't walk behind me, I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend." - Albert Camus
Pretty much my life as I have posted so far. Triggers!

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#69561 - 01/26/06 07:38 AM Re: My Rape Survivor Story
nivekld75 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 10
Loc: Idaho
Quote:
Originally posted by Thad:
Hey, Kev
I read your story and I am so sorry for what happened - I also wanted to let you know that I was concerned with your being upset with the use of the term "sister" - I think it was used as a slang term that I have often heard among Gay survivors - and I feel sure Dominic meant no harm by it - it sounded like it triggered something for you that you found upsetting.

I wanted to say that you made a big step coming here to talk about what happened to you. It is a very big step in the road to healing the trauma you have endured - these guys can give you some support that you will probably not find many other places - I hope you can take time to look at what was upsetting to you and perhaps even talk or post about it -

If want to talk some more with me, feel free to Personal message me. I hope you will stay, though since we clearly need your voice here and I believe you will learn much from us.

Thad
MS site administrator
Please remove me from the board. Lostcowboy said all I need to do is to notify you. So here is my notification. Yes I was offened and that is my problem, that and I am trying to run my own discussion board not related to this, it is just a run of the mill discussion board and I have too much to do there as I am trying to recruit for my board and get it perfected. But the MAIN reason is, I am just out of place here, and was offended, and this is my way of dealing with it. Thanks.

_________________________
HE SAID IT, I BELIEVE IT, THAT SETTLES IT!!!
Kev
Rape Survivor

Top
#69562 - 01/26/06 02:29 PM Re: My Rape Survivor Story
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Kev,

All the best of luck with your discussion board, and if you should decide to return here sometime it would be great to see you again.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#69563 - 01/26/06 02:50 PM Re: My Rape Survivor Story
nivekld75 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 10
Loc: Idaho
Thanks

_________________________
HE SAID IT, I BELIEVE IT, THAT SETTLES IT!!!
Kev
Rape Survivor

Top
#69564 - 01/26/06 10:08 PM Re: My Rape Survivor Story
Steven Heath Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/06/06
Posts: 81
Loc: New York City
nivekld,
i as a gay person am truly sorry that someone offended you with "gay slang". this place is supposed to be a safe and respectful forum for everyone to speak. that is all i wanted to say.
s h


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