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#66022 - 10/11/06 01:38 PM ..
soapy bubbles Offline
Member

Registered: 09/05/06
Posts: 332
Loc: london


_________________________
"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.” --- Eleanor Roosevelt

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#66023 - 10/11/06 01:49 PM Re: ..
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
SB,

I's so sorry you two have had this happen to you. It must be an absolute nightmare. The lesson is, of course, to be very very careful who you give details to on the internet.

That said, the real question is how to proceed now. From what you have said, my guess is that this person is an "oxygen thief". She craves attention of whatever sort, and so long as she has that she will continue to thrive.

It will be difficult to restrain yourselves, I know. But SB, cut the bitch off. ;\) Just ignore her. After awhile she will take her act elsewhere.

I know nothing about the legal aspects of this. But I really would just ignore her. Sure, make sure your friends understand what's going on, but apart from that just drop it. Anyone with one iota of sense who sees a vicious online profile will have their doubts about her anyway.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#66024 - 10/11/06 01:56 PM Re: ..
soapy bubbles Offline
Member

Registered: 09/05/06
Posts: 332
Loc: london


_________________________
"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.” --- Eleanor Roosevelt

Top
#66025 - 10/11/06 02:02 PM Re: ..
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
SB,

I think one thing that will help you is to bear in mind that the net is a great resource but full of poison as well. We have all seen it. When I see some crap about someone I immediately have my reservations. I think the vast majority of the people who see that profile will also have second thoughts and wonder what's really going on.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#66026 - 10/11/06 02:13 PM Re: ..
soapy bubbles Offline
Member

Registered: 09/05/06
Posts: 332
Loc: london


_________________________
"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.” --- Eleanor Roosevelt

Top
#66027 - 10/11/06 02:32 PM Re: ..
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
SB,

From what you have said her and previously, my guess is that your bf sees this episode as yet another proof that the world is full of danger and that he is powerless against it. And if that's true, then fighting back - by committing to recovery, for example, - is a BAD idea; it won't work and will just expose him to more harm.

This kind of thinking is so common among survivors, and it comes straight from the false lessons they learned as boys. Maybe it would help him to talk about it this way, and to compare this unfortunate episode with other things in his life that have gone well.

It's also something that ought to come up in therapy; a T would really be able to help him here.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top


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