I would suggest no pushing at all. But that does not mean to not do anything, either. Real priority for you has to be taking care of you.
As a cautionary tale, my ex-girlfriend though she should push. She was a therapist, so I guess she figured she knew best. The key part of that was the term "ex."
Something that may be helpful from Al-Anon? (that is the friends and family part of Alco. Anon) They teach "You did not cause it. You cannot control it. You cannot cure it." Same in this domain.
I guess if some perspective would help about the future? He is probably so stuck on the past stuff, that the future you keep (from his perspective) obsessing over is just too much. Time gets strange before and during recovery. Yesterday becomes today and will be every tomorrow until the problems are resolved. However, that is one relief of recovery -- the timeline goes right.
My advice would be to back way off, and you get you help. That is OK, and will probably do far more for the situation than it may seem. A book you may like is "Allies in Healing" by Laura Davis.